Before you go any further, please read a powerful piece that was sent to me in email. Then come back to this page and hopefully understand a little better what abuse is about.

Domestic violence shouldn’t happen to anybody, anywhere anytime. Ever. Period. But it does---and when it does, you need to know there are people out there ready, willing and able to help.

Maybe you are living with abuse right now, maybe experienced it just once; maybe you work with or live next to someone who is being abused. Whoever you are, help is available.

Your life and your safety are most important. Everything else is secondary. You just need to remember two things: 1.) Battering is never okay; 2.) You are not alone.

Domestic violence is a learned pattern of behaviors used by one person in a relationship to control the other person. The partners may be married or not married, living together, separated or dating.

Examples of domestic violence are:

• emotional abuse through mind games, name-calling, or put-downs
• isolation from family or friends
• economic abuse by withholding money or being prevented from getting or holding a job
• actual or threatened physical harm
• sexual assault
• stalking
• intimidation

The violence can be criminal and includes physical assault (hitting, pushing, shoving, etc.), sexual abuse (unwanted, forced sexual activity) and stalking. Although emotional, psychological and financial abuse are not criminal behaviors, they are forms of domestic violence and can lead to criminal abuse.

The violence takes many forms and can happen all the time or once in a while. An important step to help yourself or someone you know in preventing or stopping violence is recognizing the warning signs listed on the Violence Wheel.

Anyone can be a victim of domestic violence...young, old, rich, poor, black, white, professional or unemployed. There is no typical profile of domestic violence victims except that they are most often female and children.

Children living in homes where a mother is abused are more likely to be abused themselves. Even if they are not, children who witness abuse are victims. Statistics show that children who grow up in an abusive enviroment are more likely to become (or marry) an abusive person.

If any of this applies to you, help is yours for the asking.

If you are in an abusive situation, REMEMBER

• You are not alone.
• You are not to blame.
• Battering is a crime.

And, you can get help! If you are in immediate danger call 911. Isn't that what you would do if your house was on fire?

Separation Safety Plan

If you know someone---a friend, family member, neighbor, co-worker---who may be in need of this information, please pass it on.

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